In a 2-horse race, I’d back the loser…
In other words, I’m not much of a gambler, though to an extent I’m familiar with the concept of betting odds. Betting is not something we do within or about a ministry, but we the idea of “chance” has been playing on my mind recently.
Was it simply luck that I stuck with my faith through my teens, unlike so many of my peers, albeit in a fairly loose way until I hit 19? Or were there other factors at play that, so to speak, increased the chances, of me taking my walk with Jesus seriously?
My home* church was, at least as I remember it, fairly dull on Sunday mornings. We had a dwindling Sunday School, but at various times, thriving youth activities. I don’t remember a single sermon or lesson from Sunday School. I do though, remember the people. Arthur, the Sunday School leader, bashing out cheesy tunes on his guitar before we went to our different classes and running a kids club during the week. Shirley, the organist, who always had an encouraging word. Clive, my first Boy’s Brigade Captain, later followed by William at BB and my youth leader. There were others too, parents of friends at church, some of the retired folks who knew me by name and greeted me with it every time they saw me.
Some of them saw something in me for the future, most probably didn’t. Some were involved directly in youth ministry, but most of them weren’t, at least officially. Except, they were, probably without knowing it. Every time one of the old ladies said hello to me, she affirmed me. Every time one of the older gents asked about sport, he acknowledged me. When an usher greeted my by name every week, I felt welcomed. When I was asked to help with the offering, or read from Scripture, I was given responsibility that made me feel trusted. When the church wanted to start a new youth group and asked me for input, I felt listened to.
So no, it wasn’t chance that I stuck with the church. Part of it was a conscious choice to belong, but that was made easier by the people around me who I wanted to be among. Part of it was wanting a fuller relationship with Jesus and experiencing God personally. You may not think you are involved in youth ministry, but you are. As a young person, I wanted to be at my home church because the people wanted me there and demonstrated it every week.
* Mt Pisgah is very much my home church now, and even though I haven’t been to Bray Methodist for 20+ years, as the church I grew up in it will always be my home church, just as I’ll go home to visit family and friends in Ireland and then come home to Virginia.
My Mental Health Story
Over recent weeks the topic of mental health has popped up several times in conversation, often under the labels of depression, stress, anxiety, worry, self-worth and more. I’ve had these conversations both inside and outside the Mt Pisgah community, with young people and young people in old people suits as Pastor Jay puts it. In light of those conversations, I’ve decided to share some of my mental health journey, not because I have all the answers, but because I have been there, I am there, so can relate. If you are going through some hidden struggles, you are not alone.
I’ve been on antidepressants since March this year. Whether or not you actually caught Covid-19, the pandemic has hit us all really hard. Remote school and work, remote worship, remote everything. God made us to be in community with each other, and while Zoom etc have their place, there is nothing like being in the same place as other people doing the same thing. (Don’t get me wrong, I also need my down time, on my own, to recharge.) With hindsight, my depression probably crept in fairly early on in the pandemic, and I put my heightened stress levels then down to being locked down and so on. I’ve seen counsellors before, so reached out to Vipcare to chat with someone in spring/summer 2020. Doug was, and is, wonderful to talk to and helped me reflect on what was going on inside me and how to respond positively to that. I still remember him telling me that anger needs to be allowed to seep out of us rather than explode out of us.
We kept meeting, virtually of course, through the rest of 2020 and into this year. Gradually though, my depression deepened, and eventually in March this year I realized I needed more help, so went to my Doctor and was prescribed medication and signed off work for 3 weeks. The first 10 days or so were a fog, I was mostly asleep! Gradually, my physical energy levels returned and I spent a lot of time talking to God about what I was going through. I also talked with Amie, trusted friends and my pastor at the time. Ultimately, I stepped away from youth ministry for a season, not knowing how long that would be. I was in that rough, hurting, doubting place when Amie, Aoife and I first stepped into Mt Pisgah. Within minutes, I recognized this to be a safe place. I felt safe, knew I was in the presence of God and his loving, caring people. Mt Pisgah became part of my healing and recovery, and obviously now the place I serve as youth director.
I continue to take antidepressants, but feel much better than I did. I continue to see Doug at Vipcare, though less frequently than before. I’ve learned to recognize how my “mood” for want of a better word, moves up and down through the day, and what I can do to stay in a more level place.
My answers though, may not be your answers. We’re often told we are the people that know ourselves best, but we don’t know everything there is to know about ourselves. I’d no idea that my brain chemistry was out of balance until I started the medication. I couldn’t self-process my mood and actions, so needed someone with the right expertise to help me do it. Your situation is likely different to mine, mental health is a very personal illness, affecting us all differently.
If you are struggling with anything hidden, here’s good news – you don’t have to tell the world about it. You can keep it to you and a few trusted people if you want to, but please, don’t keep it to yourself.
Be good to yourself, and in these challenging times, may you experience the comforting presence of God, know that you are loved and treasured, here on earth and in the heavens above.
God bless,
Andy
Youth Ministry and Hospitality
I love Abraham and Sarah. They are so utterly human, and God still chooses to use them. Sarah laughs at God. Abraham treats Sarah horribly, not once, but twice. If God can use them, he can use me, not least because I can identify with their journey to a land far away. But they also knew how to welcome strangers. Abundantly and generously.
In Genesis 18 three visitors wander by, and in the cultural tradition of the day, Abraham offers them hospitality. He gives orders for a calf to be butchered and bread to be baked. Lots of bread. Three seahs comes to about 36 pounds of flour. A lot of bread. And it isn’t going to appear in a moment, because to bake it fresh takes time, as does preparing the calf. And while they ate, he stood near them under a tree, ready to meet their needs. To me, it’s a beautiful picture of (youth) ministry.
All of our youth ministry activities currently happen outside, under a tree (of sorts anyway). I’ve seen folks looking at it on a Sunday wondering what it is and why….
At the heart of the answer is hospitality. With Covid the way it is at the moment, by meeting outside we can break bread together. Or burritos. Or anything else that comes pre-packaged and pre-prepared. And youth group without food and/or drink just isn’t the same.
So with a bit of Duct Tape, Tyvek and a couple of hours crawling around on my knees putting it together, we have a couple of walls to keep the heat in, lights for when the hour changes this weekend and space to gather and be community as we explore who Jesus is and what it means to follow him in the here and now.
It may not be the lavish hospitality that Abraham offered, but in a unique season it’s a unique solution to how we can gather in person and be together. For me, it’s just the latest iteration of how I offer a place of food and drink, both physical and spiritual, to all who hunger and thirst.
Andy, Nov 1st 2021.
PS – if any other small groups in the church would like to use the space during the week, please get in touch with me.
Supporting Youth Ministry without Supporting Youth Ministry
Huh? What? That sounds counter-intuitive, and yes, at first glance, it is. However, there are lots of ways that you can support youth ministry here at Mt Pisgah without supporting youth ministry. Let me explain…
Many people react to the phrase “we need some help at youth group……” by looking away, ignoring the question or whatever, assuming the help needed is to be present, in the room with a bunch of scary teenagers. However, that’s not always the case, and even for those who aren’t in a contact position, there is a role to play.
I used to voice frustration (very much tongue-in-cheek) when Paul leaves out the role of youth pastor when he talks about some being called to be pastors, teachers, evangelists, prophets and so on. Then I discovered Deuteronomy 6:7, here it is with some important context:
Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. 0Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. (Deut 6:4-7, NIV)
We’re all familiar with verses 4 and 5, quoted by Jesus in the Gospels. But verse 7, to me, and again, my tongue may be a little in my cheek, is the first mention in Scripture of youth and children’s ministries, way before Paul even thought about those roles! But, and it’s an important one, I firmly believe the “your” doesn’t apply just to those of us who are parents, but all of us in a church community. Remember, when God spoke those words, the whole village/community was involved in raising the children, they were the community’s children almost as much as they were the parents. “Your” children, in a sense, are those who are part of your church community. So yes, I do believe that all of us have a role to play in youth and children’s ministries, but that only some of us are called into a place where we are in regular contact and have leadership responsibilities.
So, how can you support youth ministry without supporting youth ministry? Here are some options.
- Go to a football game, theater production, art show, track meet or anything else our youth are participating in outside church. I usually have a list of what’s coming up.
- Pray for us. Yes, it’s the obvious one, but really important. Contact me if you want some specific prayer points to cover.
- Cook rice. Or chili. We are planning a retreat weekend in February next year and will be self-catering, so if there happened to be donations of either of these, I wouldn’t complain. (Though the menu may change before then, so check in with me in January J, thank you.)
- Write birthday cards – I’d love a volunteer to help me keep track of students birthdays and make sure we get cards sent out in time.
- Take photos – could you be our official photographer? It involves coming to youth group occasionally and being in the background to take a few photos here and there, and occasionally to special events, either at church or in the immediate area.
- Write random notes of encouragement. If you see or hear of one of our children/youth doing something notable, drop them a line. Leave it in my mail box at church and we’ll take care of mailing it. If you’re not sure of a name, check in with me and I can pass it on.
- Write postcards. We have lined up a mission trip for next summer, and it would be wonderful if every participant got a postcard during that week encouraging them.
It’s often easy to refer to youth ministry as “my ministry”, but in truth, it’s our ministry, a shared responsibility. I know that not everyone wants to, or feels called to, lose sleep at a retreat or eat fast food every Sunday evening, but we, the community of Mount Pisgah, when we all pull together in different roles, can have a huge impact on our students.
